Recent Comments

    1. I laughed so hard, tht guy is hilarious.
      “Faxing number and shit: MOTHERFLIPPING CHECK ALL OVER THAT”
      “If you don’t believe me, check this shit out” LMFAO!! ROFL Best Win ever!!

    2. so i want to no if the employer he sent this too posted this or if he did, i want to no if he really has the balls to send this cuz anyone can type this up n post it u no

    1. dicktracy, are you sure he’s fat there’s more than one ron d. in the world. i mean he said he’s honorable & was prom king two years in a row PLUS he’s been to a spa…. i find it hard to believe high schoolers would nominate a fat guy twice for prom king and he win. or go to a spa. sounds like a hot guy that takes care of himself. just a thought

  1. Oh fine, I’m actually having trouble at my university studies right now but now I know what to do if things get too fucked up! NO employer could reject such an application!

  2. All of you wanting to hire this guy must work at McDonald’s or Wal-Mart or some other dead-end McJob.

    I wouldn’t hire this dumbass to cut my lawn, let alone to work in my business! LOL

  3. I’d hire him for office laughs. I think the workplace needs people like him for lighten up the mood sometimes. People can get wayyyyy stressed and a few laughs would be good…Not the best application and shit, but the funniest and shit…by far

    1. HAH you are right, if I ever need to liven up the place, a guy who gives nothing but shit (and the best shit! I won’t hire anyone but the one who gives the best shit!). =D Shit’s the shit. (heh, try saying that fast 20 times)

  4. 1) You said “shit” seven times
    2) organizing: everyone should learn to be organized
    3) everyone knows how to pick up a phone and dial 911. What is so unique about calling numbers.
    4) Customer support: you will be asked to explain in detail without saying the word ‘shit’ and other brainless vocabulary how you will deal with a certain person and situation at work.
    5) Faxing Numbers: Anyone can learn to dial a phone number and press the huge “dial” button.
    6) Being prom king in high school? How does this help you in an aviary when you work with the natural environment? Comb your hair in front of a deer while you’re at it Ranger.
    7) No I do not believe you until I see you in person
    8) Solving a Rubik’s cube may be impressive, but again, how does that help you with your job?
    9) Killing a hawk and boasting about it when you want a job in an aviary. I don’t know if you are thinking. If you would like to kill birds I suggest perhaps a slaughterhouse for chickens. I’m sure they will love you too.

    10) If you aren’t looking for a job, don’t send a meaningless letter that isn’t even a real resume that describes your achievements. We don’t just want to know who you are, we want to know your achievements and know why we should hire you.
    11) What you do on your weekends as well as your hobbies are irrelevant and is also irrelevant to why we should hire you.
    12) Everyone must do their duties in their job position, this is called being dependable
    13) Looks and heritage doesn’t make you who you are, your actions do.
    14) Pimping is illegal. And so is jumping from top buildings.
    15) You do ‘pop in’ on your boss, you make the appointment first.
    16) Stalking is also illegal, so please stop harrassing the employer and the company.
    17) Your random comments shows your low level of IQ
    18) Ask your parents or friends for advice on how to make a resume, as I am sure they are the only ones who love you, if not your friends then your parents. If not your parents, stop boasting and don’t expect special treatment.
    19) Or you can meaningless wander around without a job or a low pay job and never finding what happiness is.

    1. I think the Aviary would be even more embarrassed if a person with such degraded and poor resume and lack of motivation in making a successful or attempt to apply for a job in Aviary was ever allowed to sully the good name and for greatly disturbing the community. Any working staff member and especially the CEO would agree. It’s amazing to see how far people try to rebel and defend things that aren’t even real and have no purpose in life.

    1. I’m surprised so many people like this, its clearly not a convincing letter and will be rejected by just about any employer. In this cruel world no one would hire this type of person who is so unprofessional. It amazes me and stupifies me to see so many think this letter would give one a job. I would bet that this definitely won’t win a job position in the Aviary or at Woodman’s or Target. And the fact that if someone denies this, my point would be proven. Considering that people who take offense at this would have realized the truth and have difficulty accepting it. Which is also why ignorance is a bliss. Oh the irony.

    2. wow okay that wasn’t the point. you suck the life out of people, i hate that for you. this comment you made was a) not funny and b)just flat out unnecessary, just enjoy the freaking joke.

    3. lol Oh dear did I do something wrong? Like, pointing out the reality of life? This is the prime example of human ignorance. People laugh and joke about things, and when someone presents the truth, they all rebel and make the truth as a lie. If you think making this kind of joke is okay, what makes pointing out reality worse? You are equally a hypocrite for trying to hide from what is already in front of you. So what if people point out reality. It is because of these criticisms that we can be reminded of how we should always strive to do better and NOT be sloppy people, or people who are a bunch of pussies and can only take laughs and giggles and praises for stupid jokes at life and can never accept anything else but.

      All examples of ignorance.

    4. Also, I enjoyed the joke so much I decided to make a long ass comment. Pretty cool huh. Bash all you like 🙂 It’s pretty futile though since the point has already been made.

  5. This letter mentions about applying for an Aviary. If you look at the top it says Office Manager at Software Company. This letter is full of contradictions and meaningless statements that have nothing to do with the job. But I love it. I’d totally put “No Shit Sherlock” in my essay.

  6. What a laid back yet fun job description. Again, I don’t see how the job application even fits the job requirements. But I guess there can still be a job for people to do whatever the hell they want. People lack sense of discipline and responsibility these days, its sad. Anyone who has such lazy and sloppy way of thinking and way of life………just ‘ain’t worth his salt’. Still, it’d be nice not to work so hard in life, but that would show meaningless life would be. Life must come with hard work after all. And that is the essence of truth, if you disagree, try finding a job. It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible either. But when you face reality and the world, you realize much more, like self interest, and hello people, others have their own self interest, whether or not they will hire you is their own damn decision. Sighs* This is the world.

    1. Why do people trust name brands like Apple, HP, and not some lower brands? What ¼kind of clothes do you wear, what kind of electronics and sports teams do you like? The same is applied in the real world. In the real world, no one would want to hire such low quality. However, I like your honesty, for that I give you a star é☻^╡♦0♥♠♦◘♥♦♦½►☺╓¥♥♦♫◘☺◘♠☺ü▒±=┘TXÄéåJç♪èï}~`|Çü,A^|åÉ╥`╥╥╞╞╦ΦταΩΦΘτ1Ω≥ÉæÆôöòû╝╜h╩ (what? I thought you guys LOVE random brainless shit?)

    1. 1) Trolls provoke people and enjoy doing so and tend to challenge the morality of life and how things are. If anyone does a horrible job of this, it would be failure who made this application.
      2) I may seem like I am rambling, but in fact I said everything for the sake that others won’t be like that, and because I simply wanted to state the truth. And I simply dislike people acting like random idiots praising random uploads that aren’t even funny. A third of the pictures here is full of sexy and fitting in fails with hundreds of chubby colored people. It’s not like we don’t see that in real life.
      3) I am not a troll, and I am never a troll. I’m simply a noob who wishes to state the truth and shed the light in reality to those who are blind and lack the brains to post brainless things. Again, people are ignorant for not even realizing the truth. They only bash at it. It’s ugly.

  7. I can bet you any sane adult or Professor in college would agree with me. If you think otherwise then something is wrong with you, so don’t even go accusing people of being trolls.

    1. What a small world you live in. I bet this guy, in the right market, would make an EXCELLENT salesman, or marketing guy. Creativity IS profitable in this world….just not in yours, I guess.

  8. I bet dude just put in this application because, I’m pretty sure, its required to apply for jobs to continue to collect unemployment. Doubt any business would hire anyone based on this resume (application?…… I’m not entirely sure what it is really). I do like the stalking part though. That’s the same way I woo the ladies. Either way, it’s pretty funny and shit.

  9. “I bet this guy, in the right market, would make an EXCELLENT salesman, or marketing guy. Creativity IS profitable in this world….just not in yours, I guess.” I agree, creativity is a win. But do a favor, ask a marketing professor and ask if that kind of job application will give someone a job or is ‘creative’. We all know the answer. There is no need to cut corners. Creativity and writing up something that has unprofessional and immature written all over it is not going to give you a job in a serious business. But it might, as you say. But if you think that is a high quality A+ sales pitch or salesman, I pity you. All of you. Because even Wal-Mart ain’t ‘buying that shit’. But I digress, you may ignore my truth for now and realize it when you face the harshness of reality. It will come to you, whether you like it or not. I’m just a guy who states the truth not for my own benefit but for others. I give a shit about others, and I will always be put down for it. But I continue because I care. I hope the rest of you will wake up and see the light. This will be my last comment here on epicfail. I apologize for the so called ‘troll’ messages, even though I didn’t really make anything up or anything that may be false or a lie. I only hope that people will stop posting pictures of fat people cuz I see fat people here and there all the time in public. Who hasn’t seen that? There’s another example that we need creativity.

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